Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Failing publicly

Having my in-laws here has made my life miserable. Their constant (unsolicited) advice, their judgments and their constant ego inflation feels like a daily reminder of what a failure I am as a mom. As a working mom, I have one job each day, put Boy to bed. Since they have been here, I have failed every night. Normally, I fail in private and succeed in the same way. If Boy gives me fits, I can let him cry a minute in his crib and then go try again. When I do this now, I get very disapproving looks and grins of pity.

Last night, after failing and having to hand over Boy so I could run to get birthday presents, I got to hear what an easy time they had and how easy it was with just giving him his blanky, as if I hadn't tried this for an hour...So, now, I am on my own and have to struggle through bedtime without walking away from the baby.

Because they are all staying here it feels like the walls are closing in on me and my failure. Then hubby, thinking he is being helpful comes to hover and pat my leg and eventually take over my job that I so obviously cannot do. He is, of course, successful while I hide in the corner of my bedroom, the only placed I can go. There is no way out of this nightmare...

Jenny, my best to your family and Harrison!!!

1 comment:

chlorinejenny said...

thanks so much for your thoughts. He is so much better now, and we are all adjusting back into real life again.

Don't let the inlaws get to you. You are Boy's perfect parent and you know what is best for your son, not them!